I had a dream last night,
it was a terrible night sleep, one following an even more terrible night sleep 24 hours before. But
it was more bittersweet than anything I can think.
I was alone and walking across a yard of which I am not liked to walk upon,
but there I went, walking.
And if I were to rate this walk I would say it was too open.
I did not feel comfortable on this path of golden leaves and grey trees.
However, I was not in any way sad, I was just missing
a life that went and there was no goodbyes for me
only “I’ll see you soon bud.”
But I won’t be seeing him soon anymore,
and I thought about that in this dream within a dream.
And I walked not too long before he came up from behind
and I was surprised but scared
I didn’t want to ruin it
because it was too real.
In a way it was more real than this life I lived yesterday and today.
There was so much happiness in his walk and being
and I was so neutral to this
just like I was before
before I knew anything would happen.
Because no one knew.
How could you know?
We walked along for a very short period of time
a few steps at most.
I wanted to touch him,
a test to see if it was real,
but I didn’t.
The possibility that there was nothing but a wish
was too hard to bear.
And then he faded first
the leaves and dying trees were fleeting
the open path erased beneath me
and then there was I
in a blink of death,
and then gone.